One of my Very Best Friends got Married yesterday!!! Yeah, Friday the 13th, I know, but I'm not superstitious, nor are they, and 13 is actually an auspicious number according to kabbalistic numerlogy because it is one above 12, 12 representing the 12 signs of the zodiac. Thus, being one higher than 12 it represents Free Will, recognizing the zodiac and Fate, and the existence of a pre-destined path/pre-disposed personality characteristics, but ALSO adding the element of Choice, which ulitmately determines the outcome of our Lives. 13 is also an element of 113, and in kabbalistic numerology this is the value of the Hebrew word "Ahavah," Love. So yeah, I've been keen on the number 13, and on Friday the 13th for a hot minute now, at least since I've studying Kabbalah, gotta flip it, take one of the most dreaded days and make it Positive! Now that's Mind-Over-Matter!!!
Their recent Nuptials also got me thinking about marriage and the deeper meanings of what it is/means to have a serious, committed relationship. I am single, and happily so :) However, I am not at all anti-commitment, and am not objected to a serious relationship, but being the GYRL that I am, not actively pursuing one. I feel a man should pursue me, call me old-fashioned! But more importantly, I am taking my time really getting to know Myself, all the Beauty-full, and not so, Ins and Outs of THE FABUOUS ME! Also, I feel when the Time is right, the right person will be Attracted into my Life, in the meanwhile, dating is fun ya' know! However, I DEFINTELY see the value of committment and marriage. Just two weeks ago I was having a talk with a date, and he was gushing over the idea of marriage. He told me how he liked "the idea of growing more 'into' the person you are with," he's a Cancer, an Actor, and a sucker for Love APPARENTLY, and though a I was the one on the fence (talk about role reversal lol!), and found his comment a bit melodramatic, it sparked soemthing in me to remembering the magic of committed relationships, like what is that mysterious X-factor that keeps you interested and coming back to one person??? Now, I definitely see the union of marriage as valuable for child-rearing, my theory being, having the mother and the father in the household provides a stable foundation so that you will have more balanced, healthy children, but I'm not even gonna lie, in the back in of my mind have always wondered is it TRULY possible to be content with just one person for the Our ENTIRE Life? But I DO think so, the Optimist in Me REALLY does :) I remember at one point, I felt so strongly for one person that I would have jumped that broom and made a Life with him. I think in Dating, and Living Single, ESPECIALLY in NYC, sometimes we can come to commoditize/objectify people, and in all seriousness, people can kinda become disposable as f****d as it sounds, because we have our own Lives, and Thangs going on, but when you Meet Your Match, I think you'll know it. Not one to rush anything at all, it has to be a natural progression for me most definitely, but at least I am once again welcoming the time when the man in my Life won't be as accesorizable as what shoes I will wear today. Ouch! That sounds horrible, likening men to shoes, I don't really think that Luvies, just a bomb metaphor, but there ARE those who do - and NO GYRL's I don't condone stepping on the Fellas - well maybe when they get outta line lol ;)
***Thanks date from two weeks ago, and Mr. and Mrs. M for sparking me to think deeply on these things. And I Congratulate All who have found That One they can HONESTLY see themselves experiencing a Lifetime of Lessons with Together!
Yeah, I guess that's the biggest part of it, as Individuals, it is ABSOLUTELY Valuable to spend the Necessary Time with Oneself, but the Committed Relationship, moreso, than any other Interpersonal Relationship (Familial, Friendly, etc.) is the one that touches, and moves you deeply to grow and transform to become the Better/Best Version of Yourself, while providing a space for you to feel safe in doing so, as well as the person that will ALWAYS have you back, when it is done right that is...Just some early morning thoughts on Love, and Marriage :)
CONGRATULATIONS YOU TWO ON YOUR LOVE AND UNION
LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
And Luv U 2 Luvies, until the Next Inspiration!
Saturday, November 14, 2009
WHOA!!! Gone til' November indeed, Your're GYRL was off the blogs for almost 2 whole months exactly to the date! But the year got off to a bang, as you can see by my last post, Rosh Hashanah, the Hebrew New Year (and hear we are on heels of Chanukah - how time flies, I am a firm believer that time is speeding up), but sometimes you just need a break. And after some downtime, inflection, and reflection, boy do I have some pearls to drop on 'yall! Besides, experience, not just web blogging is the Best Teacher :)